Not Everything You Are
by Maybe Honestly
Summary: Post MJ. Gale is incredibly broken after the events of the war, but maybe with the help of one vicious, ex-victor he might be able to heal.


Hi, y'all! So this is my first story in the Hunger Games fandom, and I just had to write it because I honestly believe that Jo and Gale would end up together. Anyways, I really appreciate anyone who reads and/or reviews so thanks! Also, thanks to my beta: leakingpenholder. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything or Gale wouldn't be a pseudo-villian in the end.

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Gale sat with his head in his hands outside of Katniss's door. He had messed up her life so much that the least he could do is to make sure that no harm came to her while waiting her judgment from the trial. None of that made it any easier to listen to her haunting voice as she sang her pain. If only he could change things, but thinking like that wouldn't do anyone any good. The past was permanent and he had fucked up.

He was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he didn't notice when someone sat down next to him. "Whatcha thinking, Hawthorne?"

Gale looked up into the brown eyes of none other than Johanna Mason. She had been growing her hair out so it nearly reached her ears, but it was still patchy in parts as a result of her time spent in the Capitol. "What are you doing here?" Gale finally replied.

"Way to answer a question with a question. I assume I'm doing the same thing you are. Making sure Miss Mockingjay is safe," Johanna paused as Gale enhaled a sharp breath at the mention of Katniss, "I also figured someone should make sure the third member of the hallowed love triangle was still alive."

Gale was puzzled; Johanna was here for him? "Why would you care what happens to me?"

Johanna sighed, "Because on some unknown level, I like you and I figured you could use my expertise on life."

Gale raised an eyebrow before she continued in a much more subdued tone, "Gale, you aren't the only person who has fucked up. You aren't the only person who thinks they can only do bad things. You aren't the only person who hates themselves. But even with all that, I can accept that you, me, Sweetness, Baker Boy, and everyone else has a chance for something more."

"That was a very un-Johanna Mason statement," Gale replied. He didn't know if he wanted to listen to her or what she was saying. If he let himself move on, wouldn't that mean what he did didn't matter? How could he ever forgive himself for killing someone who he considered family?

"Well, Hawthorne, we're all a bunch of fuck-ups," Johanna sighed, "At least, I'm trying to move on."

"I don't deserve to move on. Not when Pr- not when people are dead. Not when it is my fault they are dead."

"I chopped off heads with my axe. You created weapons that inadvertently killed a bunch of children. It's war; it happens."

Gale chuckled. Could she honestly just write everything off like that? It was absurd. "It's my fault she's like that," he said pointing at the room.

"Really?" Johanna asked, "You personally started the Hunger Games, killed her father, picked her name, forced her to have a romance with bread boy, caused the evil devil spawn to reap her again, forced her to be a Mockingjay and then you personally killed her sister by detonating those bombs and allowing a thirteen year old into a war zone?"

"No, but I-"

"Nothing. You nothing. Life forced these circumstances on all of us. You think I chose to lose everyone I loved? Did you choose to have your father die? No, I don't think so. Along the way, we may have made bad decisions, but that doesn't make us bad people," Johanna ranted. She needed him to understand that because maybe if he accepted it, she could too.

Gale paused to think over what she said. Maybe she was right, maybe everything wasn't his fault. He wouldn't ever forgive himself for Prim, but maybe he could learn to live with it. "What am I supposed to do know?" he asked.

"You, I, we all move on. We all try to make this world a place where nothing like this happens again. You're a soldier aren't you? Fight for what's right."

"Maybe," he consented. After several minutes of silence with them both mulling over what she had said, he added, "I've been offered a job in Two."

"You gonna take it?"

"I'm thinking about it. Going back to Twelve isn't an option and pretty soon I won't be needed here."

"So you're giving up on your precious Mockingjay?"

Gale glared, "There isn't much to give up now is there?"

Johanna sneered back, "Well, don't hate me for pointing out the obvious, lover boy."

"Gosh, Jo, do you have to be such a bitch?"

"I do take a certain level of pleasure from it." At this they both couldn't help, but laugh. And somehow through the laughter they both felt a little bit lighter. He no longer felt hopeless, and she no longer felt so alone.

After a moment, Katniss's singing overpowered their laughter and the mood became somber again. "What are you going to do when you leave here?" Gale asked.

"Don't know, probably go help Annie with her pregnancy. It's not like I'm needed anywhere by anyone so we'll see."

"Well you're always welcome in Two with me," Gale said before he thought it over, but once it came out he knew he wouldn't mind a friend who understood what it was like to not be perfect, to fuck up, but at least they were both fighting to fix it.

"Aw, lover boy, how nice of you," Johanna replied sarcastically.

"I mean it, Jo. It'd be nice have a friend around," Gale said gently.

Johanna hesitated before speaking, "Yeah, maybe. I can't abandon Annie though."

"I understand."

"Well, I won't guarantee I won't go someday once Annie's okay," Johanna smiled.

"Okay, that sounds good," Gale said. He couldn't believe he was actually making plans for a future with Johanna Mason nonetheless, maybe he could move on.

"Well, us fuck ups have to stick together."

They both laughed. Somehow even with all the darkness between them, they were able to bring each other into the light. He made her feel less alone, and she made him feel less evil. It wasn't perfect, but it was enough to keep going which was all either of them could do.


End file.
